I posted this blog back on Sept 21 2010. I was a 24 year old single dish whining about boys... as usual. Enjoy the read and the bad grammar.
xo
A much older Dish who still wishes boys chased her more than she chases them
Time for some true confessions of the Dishy kind...
I chase after boys... oh yeah. I make the first move, I usually ask them out, hell I even pay for dinner. I've always kind of been that way. A grab the bull by the horns kind of girl. I guess its the feminist in me. I hate waiting around. I'm not going to sit by the phone and wait for them to call. I'm going to call them up and say "lets get coffee I'm free after 5." Yeah... no joke. That's me.
I have never been chased... guys have never really pursued me. Of course their lack of interest has always just played in to my feelings inadequacy and insecurity. Sometimes they say I am intimidating... even when I was very shy. However, if I'm intimidating it's only because I want what I want and I don't know why I would want to wait. And apparently boys are dense. No offense.
So the first boy, Hottie ring, is the only boy to ask me on a date. He came up to me wearing a beanie and shyly asked for my number and then called that night and asked me on a date for the next day. He was like me in the sense that he knew what he wanted. He didn't get my number for a friend and wait three weeks to call. He just asked. And it was awesome... not the relationship, just the up front asking part.
The rest of them have just sort of 'lucked in' to dates with me. They happen to be eating where I'm eating, they have someone invite me to a group event that they too will be at, they see me with a long island iced tea and try to sit with me and order more drinks and then have the nerve to think I'm going to kiss them in the parking lot, they invite me out as "just one of the guys"... oh yeah these guys are good at going on dates without ever having to ask. And then we just sort of fall into these exclusive relationships. We aren't seeing other people. We are steady Friday night dates. I'm their date to Thanksgiving... sometimes.
So here I am asking boys out and here they are trying to never ask me out. It gets old. I think I am pretty damn cute, funny and interesting and I'm tired of doing all the work. I'm tired of asking you out, I'm tired of paying, I'm tired of falling in to a relationship, I'm tired of you not opening the car door, I'm tired of you only complimenting the way I look, I'm tired of being the only one laughing at my cheesy jokes, I'm tired of you acting like this is something and then getting freaked out when I do the same, I'm tired.
However, I want love. I want it bad. I always have. More then a good job, big house, and fun times (all of those are things I want).. I have yearned my entire life for love. I don't know if its because I have mommy issues or daddy issues or any other issues.. or if at the heart of me my biggest desire is to live a long, happy, healthy, beautiful life with one man. A man who loves me. A man who I love like no other. And I want to start that phase of my life NOW. However the catch is... I've seen too many Disney movies, I've read too much Nicholas Spark's. I want that love that lasts. I want the one. I want someone who couldn't imagine life without me. I want someone who wants me as much as I want them.
With love
a very deep dish
(and now I'm hungry for pizza)
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